Observing the perspectives and insights of those around me, I’ve picked up on a few thought processes we, as humans, tend to adopt. The idea of living in fear is a fearful concept in itself, however it’s something people do every. single. day. Whether it’s being afraid of the unknown or being scared of a specific event in your near future, living in anxiety is often a daily occurrence.
Although fear is natural and something we all must encounter at one point or another, it doesn’t mean we should live our lives biting our nails on a daily basis. As I grow older and – ahem – wiser, I’ve come to the realization that there are a few things we must accept to live a more fulfilling life.
Change is Invaluable
This is an interesting subject to me. Unlike a lot of people I know, I thrive on change. I find it exciting, stimulating and see it as an opportunity to create a new beginning. However, I’m growing more aware that this isn’t how most people view change. To some, the thought is alarming, intimidating and downright terrifying.
This doesn’t have to be the case. Rather than fearing change, try and accept that it’s a vital part of life. Although change can be unavoidable, I believe intentional changes in your life have the most valuable impact.
A favorite quote of mine by Jim Rohn is “If you don’t like where you are, change it! You are not a tree.” If you don’t like your job, get another. If you don’t like where you’re living, move. If you’re in an unhappy relationship, leave. Remember: impossible is just a word that encourages excuses.
Being Alone Isn’t a Bad Thing
Something that’s been driving me crazy lately is the social norm of having to be in a relationship, get married, have babies, etc.
The variety of responses I receive when I tell people I’m comfortable with my relationship status, or when I declare I never want any kids is mildly entertaining. I’ve heard responses from “Oh, you’re just saying that because you’re young” to “Wow, that’s selfish.”
But guess what guys? I couldn’t care less. It’s 2017 and damn it, I’m going to follow my own aspirations! If that means being single, traveling alone and not popping out any babies so be it. JUST because that’s what the social norm tells you to do, does not mean you have to follow in anyone’s footsteps. You don’t owe society anything!
Okay, maybe that’s a little aggressive, but here’s my point: don’t feel obligated to have a significant other in your life. I understand the hype of it all, especially with social media but there is nothing wrong with doing your own thing. If you wish to get married and have a family one day, it will happen. The person you’re building in your years of independence will give your future s/o an even better version of yourself.
Not Everyone is Your Biggest Fan
I’ve been working since I was 15, so naturally I’ve gone through a few jobs since then (a guilty Millennial trait of mine). Most of these jobs I knew weren’t forever but still treated them seriously and gave my best effort. As a result, employers consistently gave me positive feedback.
Then, I found that one person most people eventually experience. You know… the difficult boss. The one you can never be good enough for. The micromanager. The one who says you can’t do the thing you’re most passionate about. Although this is one of toughest endeavors I have yet to experience, I’m lucky I did. I met the person who told me I can’t. What better motivation is there?
If you’ve experienced this or are going through a similar situation, take it and use it as fuel to the fire. Avoid letting it discourage you. Instead, learn from it and as difficult as it may sound, let it inspire you. They say you can’t, you say try and stop me. It will only make your success that much more satisfying in the end.
It’s Okay to Not be Happy All the Time
When people fall into a “funk,” they often get tunnel vision. They only see the negative and fail to remember that life every so often gives you lemons. Frankly, I’d be worried if we never had lemons to squeeze. Without hard times and painful emotions, how would you know what’s good? Strenuous periods allow you to appreciate the happy moments to embrace.
When you find yourself falling into a negative state of mind, remind yourself it’s okay. It’s okay to feel bitter, heartbroken or frustrated. Remember, these feelings humanize us. What’s not okay is to feel sorry for yourself and allow comparison to intimidate and dishearten you. No one else is responsible for your feelings but yourself. Put your head up, smile and know that you got this. 🙂
Bad Things Happen to Good People
We’ve all witnessed this in one way or another. It’s an inevitable part of life; one we have no control over. We do, however, have complete control of our reactions and how we treat others. Once you accept the reality that bad things happen to everyone, take time to decide how you want to be treated and how to treat others the same way.
Make a solid effort to compliment someone each day. Try to smile at more strangers. Hold more doors open. The more you practice these little gestures, the easier and more natural they become. Don’t live your life with dread and suspension. Live by anticipating the best and learning from the worst.